Friday, February 26, 2010

Who the Fuck Wants an iPad?

Facebook is was an excellent portal to keep updated amongst your friends and fertilize their farms. With each new layout, it seems that Facebook Inc. attempts to achieve the highest levels of fuckery with each layout update. 

It's obvious what the main issue with the newest layout is: it tells you EVERYTHING
From shit you kind of care about to shit you don't give a shit about, the new layout keeps you up to date with every action your friends take on Facebook, in case you wanted to learn about them in order to kill them and live out their lives.

Specifically, it's the groups friends join. It is not uncommon for a user to be notified that "Bettie Blowjobs joined "I love slurping on the spam along with 23509235 other profiles." Who the fuck actually joins these groups for a purpose? I'll tell you who:

An occurring trend (but not the first of its nature) on Facebook is the tendency for users to join "Be the first 50,000 fans of this group and test and KEEP an iPad for FREE!!!!!!!!!!" You see, the internet dumbs down its users to levels that would be dangerous in the real world. Observe the "first 50,000 fans" portion. Even when the groups are over the 50,000 mark, people join these groups in blind stupidity. Why? Fuck me, I don't know. Who exactly is sponsoring this deal? It's definitely not Apple, they're not looking for testers. And even if they were, why would they recruit on Facebook? There are plenty of Mac-Panthers to fill the need. 
But there is one giant glaring fact: IT'S 50 FUCKING THOUSAND IPADS. You know these things retail around $500 right? Starting. Who in the hell has $25 million to blow out their ass? Because I need to sell them my goods.

Also, check out Geekologie. They have some great stuff up there. Here are some recent highlights:

Lego Nipples (NSFW) This is pretty self explanatory.
Robot Information Graphical A neat graphic with all pertinent robot info.
Chest Yams Just check it out, you will be better for it.


1 comment:

  1. So the iPad really isn't a maxi pad???


    -David W.